One of the things they don’t tell you before you have a kid is how your television will ultimately become an indispensible lifeline while simultaneously destroying all your values and everything you hold dear. Nickelodeon will eat your soul, then barf it up and leave it on the floor so later when you walk into [...]

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Continue reading about There’s Really No Point Here Except Maybe That I Hate Victoria Justice and Her Ass Face

Bejewell on September 15th, 2011

“What we need is a BIG day of prayer!” Shouted Governor Perry with flair But Rick, I’ve no doubt That we’re in this damned drought Because Jesus hates you and your hair.

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Bejewell on December 20th, 2010

So I don’t know what the hell my co-workers’ Christmases are usually like but last week I got at least four pre-holiday emails from them listing out all the “concerns” I should have for my “safety” during this “busy time.”  I suppose I should be grateful but honestly at this point I’m just freaked the [...]

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Bejewell on April 1st, 2010

Today I saw the most magnificent puffy grey mullet I’ve ever seen and I tried to get a photo with my camera phone but some stupid kid in the crosswalk got in my way.  So all I got was this: And I’m sorry for that because seriously, y’all, this was THE MOST GLORIOUS MULLET THAT [...]

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Bejewell on April 17th, 2008

My original post was called “My ‘I Don’t Get It’ List.”  Well, it seems like every day I come up with more stuff to add.  Here’s the latest… Ryan Seacrest, host of “American Idol”  What number do I have to call to vote THAT guy off the show?   Daylight Savings Time Twice a year, my schedule [...]

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Bejewell on February 22nd, 2008

Every day I find something new that I just can’t wrap my head around.  Usually it’s the stupid stuff other people do that I just can’t understand.  But sometimes it’s a little thing that gets my attention and keeps me guessing.  I keep a running list of these things, maybe someone will read it and have some answers [...]

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Bejewell on February 20th, 2008

Okay, the title of this post might be a *little* incendiary.  As I have learned, there are a LOT of rabid Oprah fanatics out there who love, love, LOVE her and won’t stand for some half-wit in the blogoshpere talking smack about their best girl.  Which sort of proves my point. Oprah scares me.  Not the [...]

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