Bejewell on May 9th, 2013

I wash my hair I wash my face I wash my body all over the place And when I reach that one spot, there… There’s always a glob of hair. As the shampoo rinses From each long tress Some falls from my head in a graceful mess I don’t notice it trail right down my [...]

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Bejewell on November 9th, 2012

Welcome home, little plant I hope happiness fills you In the short time you’re here Before my black thumb kills you.

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Bejewell on November 2nd, 2012

He’s sexy and sparkly and a girl’s true desire. So what if he’s an old, dead vampire? It didn’t stop Bella from lighting his fire… But still. Shut the fuck up about Twilight. I get it — this story’s the stuff made of dreams. Panties cream, from old moms to young teens. But these books [...]

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Bejewell on June 27th, 2012

Since we first met, we’ve been best of friends Held hands and each other’s hair, time and again We’ve stood, strong and tall, through thick and through thin, and We’re on our periods together. Our husbands and children, all like family, too They love, laugh and bicker just like we used to, but When Auntie [...]

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Bejewell on January 1st, 2012

It started as a little pile A little pile, of dirty style To wash it would just take a while A very short, short while. But my life was busy, so I let it grow, even though I needed clean and folded clothes I really let it go. The family just kept adding more The [...]

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Bejewell on September 15th, 2011

“What we need is a BIG day of prayer!” Shouted Governor Perry with flair But Rick, I’ve no doubt That we’re in this damned drought Because Jesus hates you and your hair.

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Bejewell on December 2nd, 2010

“Where did all the lotion go?” asked the lady of the fly. “It’s morning, and I need it so! My skin’s so very dry!” “I use my lotion every day but lately seem to find, no matter what I do that bottle’s empty all the time!” “Could it be a lotion gnome, who’s sneaking in [...]

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Bejewell on November 19th, 2009

There’s a lollipop in my hair There’s a lollipop in my hair It’s strange how much I do not care About the lollipop in my hair. My boy was so happy at first, with his treat But his body was moving too fast for his feet And all of a sudden — FALL DOWN! GO [...]

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Bejewell on August 6th, 2009

You clean up my messes You soak up my spills When you’re fresh from the dryer You chase away chills In the kitchen, you dry, Clean and cover up treats In the car, you protect butts From hot leather seats At the gym, you wipe sweat And might act as a mat In the locker [...]

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Bejewell on May 1st, 2009

On Boogers There are two nostrils on this face And five fingers on this hand But only one’s the perfect fit For the boogery snack that’s planned.    ******************     On Farts A funny noise across the room A smell NOT for the faint-hearted But only when I hear the giggles Do I know The [...]

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