There’s a lollipop in my hair There’s a lollipop in my hair It’s strange how much I do not care About the lollipop in my hair. The Bean was so happy at first, with his treat But his body was moving too fast for his feet And all of a sudden! FALL DOWN GO BOOM! [...]
You clean up my messes You soak up my spills When you’re fresh from the dryer You chase away chills In the kitchen, you dry, Clean and cover up treats In the car, you protect butts From hot leather seats At the gym, you wipe sweat And might act as a mat In the locker [...]
On Boogers There are two nostrils on this face And five fingers on this hand But only one’s the perfect fit For the boogery snack that’s planned. ****************** On Farts A funny noise across the room A smell NOT for the faint-hearted But only when I hear the giggles Do I know The [...]
Continue reading about Because My Last Post Was Kind Of A Downer…
I’m busy trying to re-write all the shit my evil computer destroyed this week, and also attempting to have some kind of life, so my writing time today is even more limited than usual. However, earlier this month I completely lost my fucking mind and signed up for this stupid NaBloPoMo thing, so I’ve got to write [...]
Continue reading about A Series of Bizarre and Random Thoughts
Note: If you do not have boobs, this post will not mean much to you. And no, moobs don’t count. I had my first mammogram this week. Truthfully, I should’ve had it a long time ago, given the fact that my mom’s had breast cancer twice and all, but I’m one of those procrastinator-slash-head-in-the-sand [...]
Ponytail Ponytail You are missing from this head Just to the back-and-top of the scalp Hovers a cold, empty space Where you should be Only air now Where you once flowed Because SOMEONE made an Unfortunate Choice SOMEONE decided that the Hair on her Head was TOO Abundant TOO Long-Lush-Luxurious TOO Beautiful SOMEONE sat in [...]
I recently revealed to the world that I am a Serial Killer. I thought my confession would leave most people (a) horrified, (b) sympathetic, (c) supportive or (d) at least feeling some portion of the tragedy and the guilt that weighs so heavily upon my breast. (Okay, that last bit was a *little* dramatic. What can I [...]
Continue reading about As Requested, a Four-Liner About Farts (UPDATED)
