So last night after I published this post about search terms I got an email from my midget friend (a.k.a. My Second or Possibly Third Husband) and he was all, “What, no midget searches? There were a ton of midget searches on your last post about keywords” and I was all, “Gee, I guess nobody’s looking for midgets right now, I’m sorry,” and he was all, “Not even for midget PORN?” and I was all, “No, I guess not, maybe midget porn has fallen out of fashion?” and he was all, “That’s ridiculous, people are ALWAYS looking for midget porn, it’s timeless” and I was all, “Well I don’t know what to tell you, maybe the Internet has just realized that my blog is not the go-to place for midget porn” and he got all cranky, like it was somehow MY fault that everybody who came to my blog this summer was looking for assless chaps or dildo helmets instead of naked midgets making sexy time.  So I promised him that I would write something about hot midget sex today to try and drive more midget traffic here and

OH, HI, MIDGET FETISH PEOPLE! WELCOME TO MY BLOG. I’m sorry about this, I really am, but my midget friend made me do it.  He may be wee, but he has extremely sharp teeth and he’s also very unpredictable so I pretty much do whatever he says because I’m scared he’ll bite my legs.  I had to lure you here under false pretenses to protect my legs, I hope you understand.  Thanks for visiting anyway, and good luck finding whatever gross midget porn you were originally looking for.  I’d post some photos of naked midgets here, just to make it up to you a little, but I only know one midget and he’s being a total bitch about posing nude in front of the fireplace on that bear skin rug like I asked him to.

Also, if you’re NOT looking for midget porn but just needed some general information on midgets, I’m afraid but I can’t help you there, either.  Like I said, I only know the one midget and I think it’s pretty clear that he can’t be trusted.  Try wiki.

Sorry.

Love,

.

.

P.S.  My midget friend also bet me 20 bucks that I couldn’t work the word “midget” into this post 20 times but I did so PAY UP, BITCH.

P.P.S. Search engine optimization services available upon request.

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6 Responses to “I Can’t Think of a Good Title for This Post so Let’s Just Call it “MIDGETS””

  1. Ha! I beat my wife to this post!!

  2. First, Jim you suck!
    Second, I am really tempted to search midget porn until I find your site but since I am at work that might be a bad idea. I can see it now, why did you get fired? I googled midget porn just to see if I could find a blog with no midgets or porn. But I was on lunch.

  3. I would totally Google “midget porn” just to see what happens but alas, my husband is worried about my rapidly dwindling sanity as he happened to come in on the middle of a conversation my little brother and I were having about kitten souls and whether they were lemony fresh or not. Maybe you can work that topic into a blog post? I’d love to see what your SEO data looks like after something like that. Hehehehehe.

  4. I’m not at work, so I Googled “midget porn” and, sadly, you didn’t show up on the first page of hits, and I have my prefs set at, like, 100 hits per page.

    Sorry . . .

    But I did find a site that promised midget ZOMBIE porn. I might go there next . . .

    ;-)

  5. jeez, Beej it’s LITTLE PEOPLE!! :p

  6. $20 in the mail.

    LOVE YOU!

    -Pocket-Sized

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